empire strikes again...

"Tim" will be who this is mostly about, but first, I want to touch on me...

I met "Tim" when I was 22, he was 26. It is funny to look back on that now, because I am about to be 27, and when I met Tim I thought he was so much OLDER than me. At the time when I met Tim, I was single.. boy, is that an understament of the year.. The truth was, I wasn't just single... I was single, I had been single, and had always been single. I never wanted to settle down. ever. ( well, at least to the ones that wanted to settle down with me, but more on that later.) At the ripe age of 22, I had seen every single one of my friends enter into a long term relationship, some with even two or three long relationships under their belt, while I was on the sidelines of all of this, having never been in a "real relationship" myself. Why? I don't know. Commitment scared me. And it was not the typical scariness of, "Oh, I don't want to answer to another person," or, "I won't be able to go out with my girlfriends or meet up for wine night anymore..." No, it was different. Every time I felt like a guy who I had been hanging out with was starting to like me on a different level (i.e. for more than just casual sex or hanging out in groups with friends),I started to panic. I remember the feeling all too well, and it felt the same every time. I can even look back on some of these "victims", and I just cringe. Little did I know, that I would become the victim in the end.